So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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