Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
