I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
