summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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