so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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