I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
