Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
