I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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