SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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