We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
