is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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