Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
