no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
