i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
