I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
