She's JV to your varsity
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
