dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
