When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I forgot how hot balto sounded
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
