hotel room ftw
i don't like sucking hair
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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