Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
