He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
areolas are like halos for boobs.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
