In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
