You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Randomize
