when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
