I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
