There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
