Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
