Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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