your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
