But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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