we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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