I didn't shave. On purpose
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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