Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
