She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
