On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
