I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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