he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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