Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
