she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize