Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
