so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
