her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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