I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Everclear isn't food dammit
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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