their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize
