I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Im part way to drunk.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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