You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
