hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
