singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
