One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
