This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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